Things are hardly ever what they seem

It's funny how people think their perception of you is right.  But things are never what they seem. Most people tend to view me as mean, shy, judgemental, and my favorite "depressed".  I'm really not any of these things. I mean, I've had my moments in all those moods like anyone - but I dont walk around like that all the time
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People perceive me as depressed probably the most often because of the way I act and look. I am reserved, and I don't say much.  I value the importance of a word and dont believe in throwing them around just so people hear me.   Besides that, I am a person who carries a burden. I am a person who has encountered the heart of God.  He not only shares His love and joy with me - He shares his sorrow and distress as well.  I am moved and deeply grieved by the sin of others.  More than any thing I am grieved by the sin and hypocrisy that is found in the walls of the church.  Everything is always so sugar coated to look better then it is.  I dont see things with rose colored glasses.  Things need to change and they need to change NOW!

Moving to the Bible Belt has been very hard on me. I see and know many many people who go to church on a weekly basis, have some sort of moral code - but they lack any real and true intimacy with Jesus. There is no understanding that to know and love Jesus is to have a life consecrated to Him in holiness.
Life with Jesus is messy. It should confront your soul. It should challenge you to come up higher every day.  The word of the Lord should be getting under your skin and drawing you closer. But most people are content to just go to church and proclaim Jesus as Savior. And that's it.This is a great and deep grievance to the Holy Spirit. I can barely stand the small portion I can personally detect from His heart concerning these kinds of people. And man they are everywhere.

So maybe I am a little intense. I cant help that - it's me. I see things for what they are. Even if I only see them in a small measurement.  Im not ok with how the world is or how the church is.  I fully intend on being someone who offends people often. and I'm ok with that.